Friday, May 24, 2013

Ducky Little Secrets

Dear Diary,

I was nearly caught again tonight. Buns and the kids unexpectedly came home early from the Youth activity and I had to move pretty fast to cover up what was going on. Why can’t I give this up? This secret is killing me and Buns is getting suspicious.

It all started so innocently. A conversation at work that led to one thoughtless viewing and now I am addicted. I just can’t stop watching Duck Dynasty.

I’m so careful when I watch. The shades are drawn and I make sure the recall button on the remote is programmed to Nova or Downton Abbey in case I must change the channel quickly. I’ve covered my Uncle Si commemorative plastic cup in a “libraries rock” cozy to disguise it and I’ve become an expert at ripping off my American flag bandana and shoving it down the couch cushion when footsteps are heard outside the door.

What is it about the real life antics of self-proclaimed rednecks that is so compelling? Is it the hilarity of the ridiculous situations they get into? Is it their brazen attitude that doesn’t care one bit what the world thinks of them? Is it the deep faith that is the undercurrent of every episode?  Is it the peek into a long-held southern and completely American way of life?

Whatever it is they are selling, I can’t get enough and have even found some of their backwoods wisdom creeping into my conversations.

“When you don’t know what you are doing, it is best to do it quickly.” 

“That’s a fact- JACK!” 

“It’s like a cat with his tail in an electric fan, it won’t be long now.”

Ok, so that last one isn't something I have ever said but undoubtedly as the wife of a bearded man I appreciate the sentiment.

From Phil and Miss Kay and their refreshing and hysterically funny relationship, to crazy Uncle Si who has had one to many iced teas, to the Robertson brothers and the grief they give each other, this family is absolutely committed to each other and you can see it in everything they do.

There is no worry about whether or not anyone takes you seriously in their world and intellectual stimulation is found in blowing up a beaver dam.

Still, letting this out might damage my reputation as a civilized person so no matter how much I want to share this with the world I guess I’ll keep watching incognito. I just hope the camo car seat covers I ordered  last week don’t give me away.



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